‘Roto, dañado, un poco desesperado‘.
This literally means “broken, damaged, a little desperate…” and it’s a phrase from a song in Spanish that I recently felt at peace with. They say that you are what you think and facing my depression in a approachable and a little harsh way has somehow enlightened me (slightly).
I cannot say that it has made me stronger. Because, as a matter of fact, suffering from depression means that your emotional configuration runs faulty and it is your responsibility to ensure a healthy outcome through it all. It is my duty to understand my pain and transform it into positive thoughts and FORCE myself to go on. It’s an around-the-work clock… and it won’t end as long as I live.
To anyone suffering from depression in a minor degree (because those with important and highly compromising psychiatric conditions need extra medical and social help), let me tell you that is a matter of responsibility and a very hard work of self-consciousness. Being like that is so tiring (my ambivalence has lowered so much as I grow up but being like this is excruciating), however, as long as you create the tools to be better, it will be better.
On the next posts I will write about the things that lead me to understand my depression and anxiety.
All these beautiful pictures you see here are from Sosúa, a town in northern Dominican Republic.